Today is really a milestone. Actually it started yesterday....
I am going to be a trainer!!!
(Also, I am trying to be so excited about it that it pushes the fact that I am terrified out of my mind to the side...)
Sister Jasperson is going to be moving into every missionaries worst night mare. Opening an area, shot-gunning, training a new missionary, in a trio, in a singles ward. Whoa.
I know that she will be fantastic, and I know that she will be a success anywhere she goes.
It was a surprise, and I am a little bit devastated to lose her, but I know that she will be a fantastic addition to the singles ward so I am excited for her. :)
As for myself.....uhhhhhh...... prayers please? I wonder if it will be really awkward to train somebody that is older than me?.... I am thinking that I may just keep my age a secret unless directly asked. Don't worry, there will be no lies.
My first thought after being asked to train was "how on earth is this going to work?!" I know that God will provide a way for missionary work to be successful in this area, and that he will not let me ruin anything beyond repair. And I am trying really hard to rely wholly on that faith, because I feel like that is all I have going for me right now.
We had some great miracles this week! We have been working with someone for probably 9 months that has been less active for quite awhile, and for the first time SHE PRAYED!!!!! I was so so so so so so so happy!!!!!
It basically made my entire time in Jamestown completely worth it. Hard work pays off right?!
This is a great area to be trained in because you learn quickly that not every person that you ever meet will be baptized. But you learn quickly that that is not what makes you successful. 'Preach My Gospel' even says that your success as a missionary is measured primarily by your commitment... something, something, something. I didn't bring it (the book) to the library (where I'm emailing) so I can't quote it directly... But I have learned that my success is not based on the agency of other people. And that is a really wonderful thing to learn early on. :)
I am learning more, and more how to love people, and give them the benefit of the doubt for their honest and sincere efforts.
Sometimes I feel much better about things after I have thrown them all up in letters home. So I would like to just give a quick shout out to all y'all folks back home who read the many little rants, and unorganized thoughts I send your way. You have made a great support to the missionary cause, and I am better able to process things as I type them up.
I guess I should use a journal for that, huh?
Okay. I think this thought is mostly complete now.
I love you so much, and really, truly appreciate all of your prayers. :)